To give or not to give presents at Christmas, that is the question | Letters

Becky Kennedy thinks many people see no need for the performative gift buying for a person who needs very little. Laura Matthews says no one should feel obliged to buyYour anonymous correspondent (Letters, 19 December) implies that those who say “Shall we just not do presents [for Christmas] this year?” are ungrateful or unappreciative for the things they already have. They have the economic wherewithal to buy what they want, when they want, so the sense of special occasion, and gratitude, is lost.However, I’d counter that the reason many people have stopped buying presents for partners is precisely because they do appreciate how lucky they are, and see no need for the performative gift-buying for a person who needs, or wants, very little. Deciding not to add to your possessions for the sake of it isn’t ungrateful, and certainly doesn’t preclude giving gifts to others that are needed, wanted and appreciated. I love the undiluted delight on the face of a person who’s just received the perfect gift, however small. I also know that at 55, with a steady income and an established home, there’s very little practical stuff I need, and relatively few affordable treats I can’t afford at intervals through the year. Continue reading...